Unaware
by Ron4
Summary: Seth is unaware of feelings he has.


Unaware  
  
Seth sighed as he heard the doorbell ring. His parents were out, so he had to pause his videogame and answer it. He clumsily scrambled to his feet and shuffled to the source of interruption, not taking his time, but not exactly going as fast as he could, either. The visitor pressed the button again, causing another set of dings to erupt throughout the foyer. "Coming, coming," he grumbled, the eagerness clearly lacking from his voice. He scratched his head before pulling open the large door. "Marissa," he greeted, his voice still giving off a dull pitch.  
  
"Oh, hey. Is Ryan around?" she asked casually. He rolled his eyes. He wasn't the least bit surprised. They'd lived next door to each other forever, yet she rarely spoke to him. Now that Ryan had moved into the pool house, Seth saw more of her than he ever had before. Disregarding her boyfriend's - or ex-boyfriend, Seth recalled - constant demands, she always seemed to find a reason to see Ryan.  
  
"He's in the pool house," he said slowly, thinking.  
  
"Thanks," she smiled. She turned to walk down the walk and around the house to the pool, but Seth stopped her.  
  
"M-Marissa?" he stammered. She turned to face him, a nonchalant expression on her face. She said nothing, but waited expectantly for him to continue. "I, uh..." he began, stepping outside and shutting the door. He moved closer to her, crossing his arms. He fidgeted nervously, uncrossing his arms, and changed his mind, crossing them again.  
  
"What is it, Seth?" she asked with a small laugh.  
  
"I just had a, uh, question," he mumbled, shifting his weight.  
  
"Okay," she said, slightly shaking her head in puzzlement and expectancy.  
  
"I was just curious... just wondering, you know, it's not like I think about this all the time, it just popped into my head just now, and I- "  
  
She cut him off. "Get to the point, Seth."  
  
He exhaled, and paused. He inhaled to ready himself. It wasn't a nerve-racking question or anything, but it was just the way that Seth was that made it difficult for him. He didn't communicate well sometimes. Most of the time.  
  
Marissa waited.  
  
"Okay, I was just wondering why we've lived next door to each other for all this time, but we never talk to each other. Or, you never talk to me," he said, talking with his hands as he did so.  
  
Again, she let out a small laugh. "We talk."  
  
"We don't talk. I mean, we might say 'hi' occasionally, if you aren't with Summer or Luke or whoever. But we don't really have conversations."  
  
"Why are you bringing this up?" she asked, faintly reddening.  
  
"I just don't see what's so bad about me. It takes Ryan coming along for you to even realize that I still exist, and that's only because he's usually with me when you see him."  
  
"Seth..."  
  
"No, forget I said anything. I don't know why I brought it up, I'm sorry," he said, rubbing at his mouth. He turned to go back inside, but it was her turn to stop him; she grabbed his shoulder and rotated him to face her. She didn't say anything, and Seth watched her. She didn't have anything to say.  
  
"Look, Ryan's in the pool house. Tell him I said 'hi,'" he said, and went inside. He didn't look back. If he had, however, peeked out the window, he'd see Marissa still standing there, staring at the once again closed door.  
  
Inside, Seth let himself fall onto the couch. He had finally said something to her, and he didn't regret it. He felt accomplished. He somehow figured that Ryan would be proud of him, for saying what was on his mind. Then again, Ryan wasn't going to find out that he said anything, either. He scratched his head and grinned; unfortunately the doorbell went off again.  
  
He released an odd noise of agitation and repeated his earlier process. Again, he shuffled there; again, he wasn't thrilled. It was Marissa. "I was under the impression that you knew where the pool was. You have been here before, though not to see me. Go around the house this way," he pointed, "and you'll find it."  
  
"Seth," she said.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I've been a jerk." He shook his head. Was he hearing correctly? He convinced Marissa Cooper that she was a jerk?  
  
"Excuse m-me?" he stuttered.  
  
"I shouldn't treat you like you're not there. I guess I'm trying to prove something to Luke and Summer. But look where that got me with Luke. And Summer fawns all over every guy... um, most every guy... that she sees, including Luke. It's as if they don't care how I feel, yet I try to cater to them," she said. He still couldn't believe he was hearing her say this.  
  
"So..." he said, trying to break the silence before it began.  
  
"So," she agreed, nodding.  
  
"What now?"  
  
"I don't know..." she admitted. Looking at her fidget like that, he felt an odd sensation and his body was suddenly nearing hers, his face nearing hers, his lips nearing hers... Her eyes flickered shut, as did his..  
  
"Seth!" His eyes flickered open. Ryan was standing next to him. He looked around. He was in the living room. He must have fallen asleep while playing his videogame. He glanced at the door. Where had that dream come from? How long had he been asleep? Had Marissa been there at all? He looked up at Ryan.  
  
He didn't know where it had come from, how long ago it was, or if she had even been there. And he realized that he really didn't even care. All he knew was that he has some feelings that he hadn't been aware of before.  
  
--end-- 


End file.
